Matthew 18: 21-19:1

“Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? Seven times? No, Jesus said. Not seven times, but seventy times seven times”

There are three short words that are often painful to say. The words, “please forgive me” or the words, “You are forgiven.”

Certainly, this is a hard pill to swallow. How can you, for instance, forgive easily an unfaithful wife or husband? How can you forgive a person who has done you wrong, who destroyed your name and dignity – and by which you have no way to regain your dignity back. How can you forgive a person who has murdered your wife or your son, without any rational explanation whatsoever? How can you forgive those parents who have totally neglected their responsibilities of caring for their children, who have abandoned their families to suffer forever in pain and loneliness?

In the gospel today Jesus teaches us, “If we want God’s forgiveness, then we must forgive the injuries done to us. This point was so important in the mind of Jesus that when he taught us to pray he made it explicit: “Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us” – words we pray over and over in the mass, but wonders if we mean them.

Obviously, it’s not easy to forgive. It goes against our human nature. IN a love letter to end all love letters, a young woman wrote: “Dear Jun, words cannot express my deep regret at having broken our engagement. Will you please come back to me? Your absence leaves a void which no one else can fill. Please let’s start all over again. Signed: Your ever loving and forgiving Marietta.”

A postscript follows: “Congratulations! I heard you won $5 million dollars in the sweepstakes.

It’s not too difficult to discern the real motive behind the sugar-coated words of “forgiving” Marietta.

One indispensable attitude towards genuine forgiveness is the power of relinquishment. The ability to let go and say, “I am willing to forgive, therefore, I am willing to let go and forget.” The problem is that many of us say we forgive, but we continue to carry the bitterness and resentment inside of us.

My dear friends, to forgive entails a decision. It is not a feeling. We can still feel the revenge, but nevertheless can forgive. Total forgiveness is a process.

This gradual healing is described in a book titled “Healing Life’s Hurts,” written by Dennis and Matthew Linn. They affirm that just as physical wounds take time out to heal, so are emotional wounds. So, the need for patience and perseverance.